My child is a vampire

Seriously. She wakes up at midnight and doesn't fall sleep until sunrise. EVERY night.

Needless to say, I'm a zombie. We're quite the combination.

Just how many days can a person go without sleep? Isn't that some sort of torture in third world countries?

See the photo? That's sleep deprived me. Thank God for Starbucks & the Grande Carmel Macchiato aka Demon Voodoo Coffee.

Don't Say a Word

I'm facing a horrible reality. Next year I will turn 40. 4. 0. This is hell. In my mind I'm still 25. Not too old, not too young. But the reality is...well...40.

And I'm NOT ok with it.

I have a couple of other friends facing this same "milestone". Consider this a call to arms...if you are also looking 40 in the face, let's do something about it. Let's plan a bash. Something for us. US. Perhaps a trip away together? Toronto? New Orleans? Istanbul? Let me know your thoughts. I'm thinking May.I can NOT face this alone!

Is that a Real Baby?

I realize that sometimes people are...er...well...just plain stupid. And for some reason when they see a pregnant lady, or a new mom, they just seem to open their mouths and let the stupidity fall out. Anyone who has a child has witnessed it...and wanted to scream. Instead we smile politely, answer their ridiculous question, and move on. So today Parent Bloggers is asking for those stupid questions. (You too can join in the fun, and maybe win an iPod)

I had to think about it, because there are just so many..."How many babies are in there?", "Your breasts are already so big, are they going keep growing?" and "Oh he's beautiful, he must look just like his father" (gee, thanks for telling me I'm ugly as sin!) But I realized that possibly the A#1 stupidest question I've heard yet (and yes, believe it or not I've had it asked several times now!) is "Is that a REAL baby?"

Are you kidding me? At the Civil War reenactment I had it happen at least a dozen times. At the 4th of July parade (in our Elizabethan costumes) I had it happen at least 4 times. But the worst is that I've actually gotten it while in "normal" clothing at Target. So what do I say? Usually I'm polite and smile and say "Well, of course", but on occasion I have been particularly snarky about it and replied "No, he's a puppet" or at the reenactment "No, they didn't have babies during the Civil War". (Yes, they did say "Really?!" and thus, again I say, people are stupid.)

"Don't you wish you could have just handed them this?"

An Ode to Caleb

In my son's 3 1/2 weeks of life here on the outside I have never had more conversations, discussions, or given more praise for poop, farts or burps. Maybe it's a boy thing? But I find my self (and the hubby) praising the little guys burps ("Yeah, that was a big one"), flatulence ("Oooh, that has to feel better now") and even his excrement ("MegaPoo!") This is to say nothing of the continual fear of the "firehose" that could go off at any given diaper change...all over himself or me. I suppose considering it takes up a third of my day (the other 2/3 consumed by feedings and singing silly madeup songs...not sleep!) My husband suggested that since we do renaissance faire, we should have reconsidered naming him "Henry Tooter"! (haha!)

I suddenly feel my intellectual self slipping slowly away into the diaper pail! Save me!!