Unexplained

Today was a nice day, bright & sunny & warm. We went to the Harvest Fest, which wasn't nearly as good as it was last year, but we did buy some pumpkins & gourds & peppers & leeks. We walked around, and just spent time together. Then we had dinner with Rick & Brian, and it was good.

And yet I'm feeling blue. I can't find the words or the reasons, it just is. It's a state of sadness. A state of missing my mom. A state of feeling for those people who have lost someone special to them. A state of uneasy restlessness inside my heart. I don't know what's causing it...but that's where I am right now. Hopefully it'll be gone by morning.

Inspired

Today I'm feeling particularly inspired by the beginning of autumn.

I can't imagine living someplace that doesn't have that significant change in seasons, and particularly the joy that is the fall. I'm not a nature girl by any stretch of the imagination, and could never live much outside of a city, but every fall I can't help but yearn to be outside. The crispness of the air, the cool breezes, the lushness of color...it inspires me to bake, to paint, to explore. It is the only time of the year you will ever find me wanting to go hiking. (Of course the lack of mosquitos helps!) I want to draw & paint & photograph today (and sadly can't because I'm stuck at work...a museum that is offering TWO nature landscape drawing classes today, ironically).

I'm anxiously anticipating hubby & my upcoming trip to Mackinac Island with our friends in two weeks. The fall colors should be almost peaking up there then, and I can promise you I will be posting a plethora of photos afterwards.

Obsession

I realize that I have these wierd quirks and OC randomness. I tend to get excited about something and then become almost wierdly obsessive about it. Sometimes its been Colin Firth, where I've had to rent every movie of his. Another time it was Disney. Right now I find I'm obsessing about:
Doctor Who (David Tennant in particular)

Swap-bot (it really IS addictive)

and Mackinac Island Do you have anything you just can't help but feeling "obsessed" about?

A Collective Kick in the Arse

Today I read these words:
"What is the one thing you've always wanted to do in your lifetime? And when are you going to get around to just doing it?"

Hmmm...I consider my butt soundly kicked.

The Call of the Footlights, the Roar of the Crowd

Kidlet auditioned for the Racine Theatre Guild last week. They have a special program for teens...it's an extensive theatre training program that cumulates with performances in the spring at various schools. It is highly competitive to get into, apparently, and we were warned that unless you've been around the theatre it is tough to get into.

Well, wouldn't you know it...she got in!

Yes, I'm very proud! So despite not getting the art and drama classes she wanted this year in school, she is now in a great drama program & is also taking some art classes at the museum where I work. (Animation & pottery, I think, for the fall session.) So for now she has ambitions of being the next Idina Menzel...and that's awesome!

Don't Say a Word

I'm facing a horrible reality. Next year I will turn 40. 4. 0. This is hell. In my mind I'm still 25. Not too old, not too young. But the reality is...well...40.

And I'm NOT ok with it.

I have a couple of other friends facing this same "milestone". Consider this a call to arms...if you are also looking 40 in the face, let's do something about it. Let's plan a bash. Something for us. US. Perhaps a trip away together? Toronto? New Orleans? Istanbul? Let me know your thoughts. I'm thinking May.I can NOT face this alone!

Be Sparkly!

Some of you may remember when I wrote about Hannah a month or more ago with this link. Well, I have devotedly read Hannah's mother's blog ever since. I've read as she has moved through the pain of losing her lovely 5 year old in this tragic accident. I have been inspired by her celebration of her daughter's short little life, and her younger daughter, Lily's, delightfullness, as well.
Tomorrow would have been Hannah's sixth birthday. Her mother is asking everyone to join them in celebrating her vibrant, sparkly nature by dressing bright & fun tomorrow. Wear the sparkliest earrings, necklace, shirt, shoes or scarf you have. Heck, wear a feather boa! This dear child, as well as all of our children, need to be celebrated for the beauty & innocence and joy they bring to this world. They touch the lives of so many more than they will ever know because of their sparkly nature.
You can read more about Hannah & her family here.
I hope you'll join me in celebrating her life & the lives of our children, as well.

Yar! Avast Ye Scrubby Sea Dogs!

Yar, know ye that this hear be "international talk like a pirate day! So all ye sea dogs and villanious buccaneers had best be spaken like the pie-rats that ye be!

Lest ye be a landlubber, I suggest ye swig back a few bottles o'rum today, pull on your stripey stockings, and grab your best mates for a rousin' day of pillaging & festivities!

ARGGGGGGH!

Pouty Take 2

Baby is better, thank goodness.
But now I'm sick. Much sicker than he ever was. (Thank goodness.)
Sore throat. Painful cough. No voice.

There is something singularly disturbing about knowing that if I had to scream in order to save my life, I would die.

I'm just sayin'.

Pouty

Not much to say other than I have a 6 month old with a cold. Stuffy nose & phlemmy cough. Yeah, I'm exhausted.

Be a Rebel...Read!

I love books. I love to read. I think that reading to your children is one of the greatest gifts you can give them. I think we grow as individuals by reading a variety of books. Even the challenged or banned ones. Heck, especially the challenged or banned ones!

September 29-October 6 is officially BANNED BOOKS WEEK. I encouraged everyone to read a banned book! In this country we have intellectual, artistic freedom. We have the freedom of speech. No book should be banned simply because someone doesn't like it. (If that were the case Shakespeare or The Bible would have been banned long ago!) What sort of books get banned? Pornography? Devil worshipping? No, those don't even typically fall into radar. Instead they are often books that are considered popular or classics even. Off the list this year, but on for several years past, are the “Catcher in the Rye” by J.D. Salinger, “Of Mice and Men” by John Steinbeck and “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn” by Mark Twain.

Who are the top 10 most challenged authors? Probably a few of your favourites:

1. Alvin Schwartz 2. Judy Blume 3. Robert Cormier 4. J.K. Rowling 5. Michael Willhoite 6. Katherine Paterson 7. Stephen King 8. Maya Angelou 9. R.L. Stine 10. John Steinbeck

I'm challenging you, my friends, to pick up a banned or challenged book. And then pass it along, send it out to someone else via Bookcrossings.

And for anyone in the greater Chicago area: You are invited to come and celebrate your freedom to read during the 26th annual celebration of Banned Books Week. Join the American Library Association's Office for Intellectual Freedom, McCormick Tribune Freedom Museum, and the Newberry Library in Chicago, IL at the Pioneer Plaza (on Michigan Ave between the Tribune Tower and the Chicago River) on Saturday, September 29, 2007, from 1:00 to 4:00 p.m., for the Banned Books Week Read-Out! Local Chicago Celebrities join several acclaimed authors to read passages from their favorite banned and challenged books. Admission is FREE.

Because Clearly I'm an Expert...

Most of you know I work at the RAM/Wustum museum! I've been asked to lecture this fall/winter about Historical Clothing! It is conjuction with the shoes & textiles exhibitions we'll be having at our main galleries, because I'm clearly an expert on this topic! I'm confident I can fake my way through...er...give a great lecture (or three!) but that doesn't change the fact I'm freakin' scared to death! I'm scared someone is going to answer something I can't answer and I'll look like an idiot! So...if you have any interesting tidbits about historical clothing, let me know, ok?!!? Thanks!

Here are all the sordid details, should you feel compelled to come hear me speak:

Lecture at RAM
Interactive Lecture:Historical Clothing
Friday, 12:00 - 1:00 pm 1 Day December 7 Lecturer: Kimberly WawrzyniakDiscover how men's and women's clothinghas developed throughout the ages...and some of the quirky and interestinghabits that have survived and evolved intotoday's couture. Then, take a closer lookat artist made clothing in RAM's fallexhibitions.Members Free
$8 Non-Members
Lectures at Wustum
Clothing Through History
Thursday, 7:00 - 8:30 pm1 Day November 1Lecturer: Kimberly WawrzyniakDiscover the changes in clothing for menand women throughout history, and howclothing reflects society. See historicalclothing recreations. Registration required.Members Free
$10 Non-Members
Renaissance Dressing...and How They Did It!
Thursday, 7:00 - 8:30 pm1 Day December 13Lecturer: Kimberly Wawrzyniak See how Renaissance women dressed,and how clothing of the lower, middle and upper classes differed. Registrationrequired.Members Free
$10 Non-Mem

Welcome to 8th Grade

Sarcastic enthusiasm duly noted.


You'll note her creative take on the new school uniform requirements: skulls & crossbone headband, silver shiny tie, and Jack Skellington messenger bag.

Yes, she is definately my child.

The Pursuit

I just finished watching "The Pursuit of Happyness" with Will Smith. I cried. Hard. Because I've known his desperation. I've been in that situation...not knowing where my child & I were going to sleep or if we would eat the next day. I've known that pain of wanting desperately to take care of your child and feeling alone and scared...but trying to make it good for them all at the same time. My daughter slept in a large closet I called a room & put up pretty sparkly things to try to make her feel like it was here little private space. I'd send her for an overnight with her grandmother or dad so she wouldn't know I didn't have any food in the house that night. I went many days without food, so she could eat. I've gone years without new clothes so she'd have anything she needed. I've played the game of "let's only use candles tonight" so she wouldn't know the electricity had been turned off. I pulled her into bed with me, under all the blankets we had when we had no heat. It sucked, and I'm not proud of it. But that hell only lasted a year or so. But I will never be the same person because of it.

Fortunately today we have a house & the bills are paid (thank God for my husband). Money is tight, but nothing like it once was. So why is it that deep down I still feel scared? Since my father died & mom is invalid in a nursing home, I still feel alone in this world, despite my husband. Despite my friends.

The kidlet begins 8th grade tomorrow. I can't believe she's that old now. Each passing year makes me realize that we're a step closer to her adulthood. I'm scared she been hurt too much, too deeply, because of the bad curves life has thrown us while she was little. When do you truly know?